After my shocking exposé on the good ol’ Ogle network’s snack-profits-boosting scheme, your old Skuncle got a bit paranoid and bugged out faster than KD to California.
On the way from Oklahoma to my secret mountain hideaway, I passed through states with both medical and recreational laws for cannabis. After making some remarkable observations about how different we are, I synthesized them into five hallmarks of Okie canna-culture:
I had some family and friends visit me recently who hadn’t been to the 405 in a few years, and the first question I got was, “Do you guys have recreational pot or something?” We have countless CBD+, Golden Lotus, Grow Warehouse and Weedmaps billboards on Oklahoma’s major highways and interstates — almost as many Chick-fil-A. Moving off the highway, we find bus benches and every imaginable form of outdoor advertising.
Road tripping through several other states with varying degrees of legalization, I saw a grand total of three marijuana-related billboards: a farm, a dispensary and an addiction help line. If this phenomenon of over-saturation subsides, it’s possible we might look less like ecstatic 8th graders hyped up over a bag of shake.
Location, Location, Location…and another Location
In Oklahoma, it seems like there’s a dispensary on every street corner, side road and storefront next to a 7-Eleven. In other states, not so much. I think it would be easier to find my cousin Sasquatch than it was to find a dispensary in some of these other states. And this isn’t due to out-of-towner-itis! Even with a resourceful combination of Weedmaps, Leafly and Apple maps, I still had a hell of a time finding them. It must be the law…or I was really stoned.
A Derth of Celebrity Brands
Speaking of Willie’s Reserve, I haven’t been that high off a couple of joints in a long while. I’m talking camping in the middle of the desert, looking up to the stars whilst holding my gun, convinced the aliens will abduct me if I go to sleep kind of stoned. I pulled myself back together, put on “Red Headed Stranger” and chilled the fuck out. But, damn! I’m accustomed to more mellow shit back home.
I’m sure there’s some high-THC bud here in OKC, but I’ve not yet discovered any comparable to what I found on my cannabis caravan through other states. No doubt Oklahoma’s newly-legitimized growers will keep honing their cultivation practices, and I’ll keep searching…and smoking out.